Peter on Procreation

"if you insist on having kids, and know deep down inside that the kid is ugly, please dont be taking pictures. you know a child with jagged buckteeth is NOT cute!!!"

Peter on Camping

"no, motherfucker, you're not one with nature, you're one with stupidity!*"

*spoken in general after hearing of someone who was excited to go camping.

Peter on Dale T's Social Life

"i have no clue why the man feels he needs a social life. i don't get it. i don't wanna get it. i wanna know nothing about it, ok?"

Peter on Baby Parties, Part 2

"you wanna have cake? you know how you do it? you go down to your local walmart, you pick up a four dollar fucking cake, you take it to the house, and you cream each other's lips with it, and you giggle - HA HA HA - and talk about your girlie shit."