Saturday, August 22, 2009

Peter on The Sea

"there's nothing off the coast you need! there's sperm-semen all over the place!"

Peter on Being

"i want to be in a place where i can see and i can shower and i can shit!"

Peter on The North

"fuck going up north! there ain't nothing up north but canada and bullshit!"

Peter on Camping, Part 2

"you take the worse parts of your family, and then magnify them a thousand fold, and then put them with a bunch of cranky motherfuckers in a stinky, bug-infested dirt-filled fuck hole, and then expect everybody to have a good time... that's camping to me."

Peter on Wilderness Lust

"that sounds like a plan if your house burns down and you're out in the boondocks and you got no family nearby and no transportation! you don't do it because it's fun! you don't do it because you want to get away! you don't do it... because you don't do it!*"

spoken in response to the notion of someone suggesting "let's go sit outside, roast some marshmallows, have ourselves a camp fire!"

Peter on Camping

"no, motherfucker, you're not one with nature, you're one with stupidity!*"

*spoken in general after hearing of someone who was excited to go camping.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Peter on Going Green

"i'm telling you what, the next motherfucker that tell me to go green, is going to go size 13*!"

*peter's shoe size, inserted in the rectum

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Peter on Yesterday

"the highlight of yesterday was taking a shit."

Peter on Motivation, Part 3

"if you live in upstate NY, you've got motivation for nothing."

Peter on Nothing

"i have nothing. i want more of it."

Peter on Dale T, Part 11

"at least your father might have a few interesting stories to tell. mine is just a worthless piece of fuck."

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Peter on HD

"HD deez nutz! i'm just saying, everything is going high def... why not da nutz?"

Peter on Country Music, Part 5

"country music is a lot like having your mouth open when the dog farts."

Peter on Walking

"i was born with spina bifida and i get nothing, yet michael jackson moonwalks and he gets morphine and demerol and whatnot... i'd be happy just to WALK, much less moon-fuck-walk!"