Peter on Shopping, Part 2

"i'm sorry, aisle 3 is for toilet paper and dish soap, not toddlers with mini shopping carts!"

Peter on Having Kids

"why would i put my nuts in a blender if i don't need to?"

Peter on Shopping

"this is why the aliens wont come and give us all their knowledge: because of our fucking usage of NASCAR shopping carts for kids."

Peter on Procreation

"if you insist on having kids, and know deep down inside that the kid is ugly, please dont be taking pictures. you know a child with jagged buckteeth is NOT cute!!!"

Peter on School

"the ultimate question is why aren't these kids in school? it's august for God's sake. what are they doing outta school? see, the problem is i never had summer vacation. i was in school 24/7. i was in school all day. back then school was your CAREER, quote unquote. now it's just a hobby to these kids."