Peter on Bro

"people who use the term "bro" should be punched in the face 3 or 4 times daily."

Peter on Football Celebration

"dude, if you dance when your team is down you get fined, beaten, and shoed in the nutz!"

Peter on Sarah Palin

"reason #9953 why i hate sarah palin: up until 2008, no one actually considered alaska a part of the better 48! now, it just wont go away."

Peter on Sarah Palin

"reason #9964 why i hate sarah palin: every goddamn reality show now-a-days has to be centered around 'doing it the alaska way' which must mean freakishly crazy, insanely dangerous and extra stupid!"

Peter on Clint Eastwood

"i just got done watching clint eastwood's 'blood work'. it was an interesting movie. i kinda liked that woman who made love to clint on the boat... let's be honest, who doesn't want to make love to clint eastwood on a boat?"

Peter on Reality

"i want there to be a physical tarnishment of reality!"

Peter on Ice Cream

"neapolitan ice cream is like jesus christ - everyone has an opinion."

Peter on Adam Sandler

"there is another reality where this fucker has never made a single movie... that's my reality."

Peter on Attitude

"what if elizabeth taylor got a bit chippy?"

Peter on the Playoffs

"i'm not really paying attention to the playoffs. when your mouth tastes likes you've been sucking on a tin can, it's hard to think about anything but that."