Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Peter on I Have A Dream at 50

The dream, is just that...a dream, it can never be achieved without serious kick in the collective slacks!

When a 400 pound crippled man with a cane gets scoffed at while walking down the chip aisle of the local store or...

When a single mother gets treated like a destroyer of the American Dream because she doesn't have a father in her children's' lives (Like his participation wasn't desired?!)

Like a case of the shits; some things are just out of our control.

The dream will never be realized when someone working two jobs and who still needs food stamps to make ends meet are treated like second class citizens.

'If you don't work, you don't eat' - well, maybe someone should tell that to Congress! A person's content of character is easy to scold when you are looking down from your ivory towers wondering why they feel jilted. It's easy to engage in real 'class warfare' as you sit behind your cameras and microphones calling them 'lazy,' and 'victims' while collecting a very nice paycheck. Showing empathy for your fellow man is not Un-American in fact, it is the most American, most godly thing one can do. All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God; Love they neighbor as you would love yourself. Don't do it for your political party, do it because it's right. Do it for Christ, follow His example and simply: Do. What. Is. Right!

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Peter on Effective Parenting

"I was frying eggs while standing on a chair at age 2. I knew my parents were worthless and that I'd have to fend for myself even at that tender age."

Monday, August 26, 2013

Peter on This Day in History

"So wait, on this day in history, Woman got the right to vote and it's also National Dog Day? Well, ain't that a bitch!"

Sunday, August 25, 2013

Peter on Alternate Universe Dreams

"I just had a dream from an alternate universe! In the dream the mail had just arrived and I open a package to see that I had bought some DVD's. After looking them over I say to someone in the dream, "I already have all these, why did I buy them?" Just then, I looked down at the format: HD-DVD! Those who don't know, back in early 2000's there was a format war between the Sony backed Blu-ray (which own, obviously) and the Microsoft backed HD-DVD. I then see the MS logo, I sarcastically said 'eff this reality!' and I woke up! The movies were all from John Carpenter; one was Ghosts of Mars and the covers were generic lame-ass red-ish color. It was a very sad universe!"

Friday, August 23, 2013

Peter on Touchscreen Technology

"Can anyone remember back in the Stone Age when we had buttons and when we pushed them, they worked?! Now it's all that damn touchscreen crap *TAP-TAP-TAP-TAP-TAP* and nothin'!"

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Peter on Good Band Names

"I think 'Take Me Out To The John' would be a great name for a band."

Peter on Professional Help

"I really should seek professional help...actually, I did, and the woman said, 'We can't help you here with what you need!' I wish this were a joke, but it actually happened back in '06."

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Peter on Dead Coma Life

"Have you ever had one of those days you just wish you were dead? And by 'days,' I means 'lives,' and by 'dead,' I really mean 'coma?' That's my life every waking moment."

Monday, August 19, 2013

Peter on Fatal Attraction

"I attract weird women, en mass. These women are like, way outside my class. Let's be honest. I'm barely a 2.5 to 3. Some of these women are like 6, 7, some closer to 8. But these women fall for me and I don't get it! I'm a firm believer - there ain't nothing here you need, ain't nothing here you want! But these women, they fall - WHOOOOO - they fall! Fatal attraction! OK! That one bitch was stalking me! She. Was. Stalking. Me."

Peter on Attraction

"You don't send me a woman with a fucking mullet!"