pearls of peter

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

"dude, if you've got time to bowl, you've got time to get kicked in da nutz! it's a fact: write it down, then look it up!"

"there ain't nothing up north but canada, cold, and bullshit."

"patrick swayze makes any woman feel like a woman... hell, he even makes me feel like a woman."

"it's actually a nice little package. though every time i look it over i feel my manhood shrivling up into nothingness."

"dude, i haven't blinked in like 10 minutes. wooooooooooo!"

"i hate favre's pants ads. now, if he were selling pants for cars i might be more interested."

"i'm getting old: i can't get enough of canned peaches and fruit."

"i love endorphins. because while i eat, i don't feel anything."

"yes, you do have politics! you got the politics of pissing me off!"

"i find it so sweet that your mother gave you something video game related for christmas for the very first time...takes me back to 1984!"